Lately in an intense debate about homosexuality with commenter Brian a lot of mentions of sin came up. Apparently, being born earns you a one-way ticket to hell, unless you telepathically make up with sonny Jesus. Indeed, we’re all sinful and we must wash those nasty metaphysical shit-stains away before we can even think of walking through the pearly gates and receiving a pat on the back from Peter. I’d love to meet people like George Carlin, Albert Einstein, Nietzsche, Plato and other brilliant minds of the past, as well as contemporary geniuses like Stephen Hawking and Daniel Dennett – but I must confess I could never really stand heat and overcrowded places, so I guess it’s time for me to confess my sins to miracle-man J.C.
Sorry J.C., I’ve read parts of your old man’s book, and I thought it was utter shit. I plan on reading the thing integrally soon, so maybe that will alleviate some of my doubts I have about claims about your daddy. It’s just that it doesn’t make any sense to me, and that the parts I’ve read are inconsistent. Sometimes it appears that the book has been written by many people over a huge span of time, but that’s just silly. And even if it is, it’s inspired by The Cosmic Dude, and he wouldn’t constantly change his mind, would He? Maybe the doubts that have come to mind would vanish if I stopped using logic, because logic may very well not apply to the Big Guy. I’ll try that.
Sorry J.C., I have an inquisitive nature. I try to understand the world within a framework that is internally consistent and from which I can make predictions so I can test whether my framework is correct. If my understanding is sufficient, I try to manipulate the universe so it will act in a way that fits my needs, like other people have so I can write this article and spread this information on a global interconnected network. I’m even studying biomedical engineering so I can help people overcome disease, or make their suffering less. I’m really sorry for that J.C., I know you’d rather see me have faith, and not interfere with the Man’s big plans or try to uncover his creation. Those ill people must surely have had it coming from The Benevolent One, because of their filthy sins.
Sorry J.C., I’ve been trying to treat people equally. I’ve had the delusion that we all should just get along, and not give special treatment (either positive or negative) according to the people’s cultural background, religion, appearance or sexual preference. But I realise now, we should stop these false religions such as science and save the scientists from their demonic sect. We must deny them the rights that allow them to spread their vile and putrid ideas. We have to inform them of You, J.C., even if they say they don’t want anything to do with you – in their hearts they do! I’ve always accepted that homo- and bisexuals are simply born with other sexual preferences and let them have their way. I’ve always advocated that they have the same rights as heterosexuals, because I never found any reason why they ought not have them. I’m sorry I let you down J.C., I’m sorry I defended these people from the wrath of your followers – when clearly Father thinks they’re not people at all, but rather animals.
Sorry J.C., I’m sure that I’ve sinned more, but I can’t think of any more sins. I don’t feel cleansed yet, but that’s just because I’m sinful no matter, right? Maybe I should just go around and inform people of how bad they’re living their life and make them feel bad and fill them with fear for the licking flames of hell – people need that, they don’t listen to reason anymore. Just asking them to accept you in faith is a thing of the past. But I’ve accepted you, J.C., and I hope you can put in a good word with your omnibenevolent father, so he may not roast, burn and choke me for all eternity until the end of time. I have faith it’ll be all-right, he’s a reasonable man…
The Antichristian Phenomenon
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